I have felt it necessary to issue Niky with 2 AMBER STRIKES due to a number of her posts across the forum.
AMBER STRIKE 1
Posting comments with feelings of demand or expectation attached to them
I feel Niky is in breach of the above section of the terms of use when engaging in the assistance group thread discussion seen below:
viewtopic.php?f=11&t=521&start=10
Here, I feel a strong feeling coming from Niky of demanding/expecting somebody answer her questions. Firstly, she posts:
I feel Niky is being lazy here and expecting others do the "work" for her by providing her with answers. Because of this addiction, her post consists of one short statement that is abrupt in nature. I feel if she did not have such a demand, she may have constructed her post in a more loving manner. For example she could have said:What is the nearest airport to this event?
"Hey guys, so I've done some research and I believe I may have found the closest airports to the event, these are _______ and _______ . Do any of you guys living in Australia have any recommendations as to which airport may be the most ideal?"
Graham responded to the demand, partly I feel because he wanted to offer the help but also partly due to his own injuries where I feel he is attracted to situations whereby people such as Niky take advantage of him.
In response to Graham's assistance and providing Niky with MORE than what she was initially asking about, Niky responds by stating the below:
Niky, again the same demand is coming from you here too, but to a greater degree. The feeling coming from you here is not only that you are wanting somebody else to do all the research for you but also to provide you with personal/special assistance. If you took the time to do a simple google search, you would have noticed that Melbourne is not the best place to fly into and that there are at least 4 or 5 airports much closer to the event. I remember when I went over to the assistance group last year, I was that excited to get there that I wanted to research and formulate the plans to get to the location which seems to have been a much trickier task than the location of this second event. I did not have a thread on a forum offering a platform for me to engage with others. I'd suggest that if you are going to the upcoming groups you look sincerely at the developing your own will to love series of talks from the 2014 assistance group videos.Thanks guys, I would be flying to Australia from California, so then my destination would be BNE Brisbane airport, correct? The map looks confusing to me, I would have thought it was Melbourne.
You are attempting to abuse Graham after realising that it worked for you initially and to be honest, it is pretty unloving behaviour. You are not only taking advantage of Graham but also the provision to discuss such matters here on the forum. There is also another addiction highlighted here in not taking personal responsibility for yourself which forms part of the 2nd amber strike.
AMBER STRIKE 2
Not taking personal responsibility for your own emotions and growth by repeatedly trying to involve others in your own emotional work in a narcissistic manner rather than from a humble/loving intention
As touched on above, part of the issuing of this strike does come from your actions on the assistance group thread but also as a general theme that I have recently been noticing in your forum posts.
I highlighted this injury to you a few months ago in the below thread, as well as Lena taking the time to offer you with some assistance:
viewtopic.php?f=43&t=530
You acknowledge the feedback however I feel you have not taken the time to fully self-reflect and emotionally investigate what was shared with you. This is quite clear to me as the same addiction is present in the below threads:
viewtopic.php?f=11&t=605
AND
viewtopic.php?f=42&t=698 << Eloisa provided you with some feedback here regarding this too.
AND
viewtopic.php?f=11&t=683
If you re-read and take time to reflect on the feedback that I have shared with you in this strike thread along with the feedback shared with you by myself, Lena and Eloisa the the above linked threads and take the time to watch the 2014 assistance group talks that I have recommended above, you can make some progress on these areas before you attend these upcoming groups, which I reckon will be of huge benefit to you.
Thanks
Nicky