Hi from Sweden

[Anita]

Hello everyone,

This is awesome with the forum and the blog, Thank you Nicky, you have put in so much work in this!

I'm Anita, 54 years. I discovered Jesus and Mary and Divine Truth 4 years ago. I went to some of the seminars in Greece, the Swedish seminars, UK seminars and would Love to attend some form of seminar again or assistance group which hopefully may be happening in Europe in the near future.

Where I am at now, I live on my own, with a son who lives with me. I have not met my soulmate, he is staying clear of me. I have so much rage and anger towards men. And the feelings towards having a relationship with a man is this, that my father, older brother, grandfather and the men I have attracted during my life would all be pressed into one mould and that is my soul mate. And that is not very appealing to me I even at one stage hoped that he would be dead so I did not have to have a relationship with him. Poor guy, I have loads of repentance to do and I have not even met him yet! I'm moving into feeling more positive towards experiencing my fears, and do not get into food-tv-chocolate addictions as easily as before. Getting to spend more time with myself and that will help.

I work with translating seminars into Swedish. It takes time, and I can't do too much at one go. It is such a Great opportunity to delve into the material and immerse myself in it.

I feel that Law of Attraction has changed a bit, better relationship with, daughter and son. I have a job that I love, very inspiring and a boss that is nothing like the ones I use to attract. But it does not pay a lot. And there is this thing, 'You can't enjoy your work and earn money at the same time". Bodywise - less pains and stiffness, actually looks a bit better too. But there is this big thing with soul mate and men and money. I have only taken baby steps so far, and now it is time for the bigger ones!

Thanks for having me here.
Love
Anita

[Alkhemst]

Hi welcome to the forum Anita - I really liked reading your honesty in your intro about stuff that's probably hard to admit, thank you.
David

[Teresa French]

Hi Anita

I was struck by the comment you made about not being able to love your work and being paid for it at the same time and I wanted to show you a different perspective.

My experience is different in that I work for myself in a shop and love what I do and I make money doing it - and as I work through my injuries I am becoming more and more secure financially - still have a long way to go as I started a long way behind in debt due to unethical behaviour in the past, but focussing on being ethical and following the golden rule (do unto others as you would have them do unto you) has really moved things along for me.

Cheers
Teresa

[Anita]

Thank you Alkhemst and Theresa,

Theresa, I also work in a shop and being ethical is important to me. Contradictory as it seems I feel safe and comfy having little money, because my world gets to be very small with limited choices and that is a fake security. I have huge issues with feelings of being worthless.

I love the work I'm doing now, it's perfect LoA and mirrors what I want to and feel ready to do in my own home. A Big desire I have and have had for quite a few years now is to work with restoring lands, like Greening the Deserts and growing all lovely and delicious fruits and veggies. To do that I need bigger finances.

[Nicky]

Hi Anita

A warm welcome to the forums.

It's great that you are gifting some of your time to translating the DT content into Swedish. I guess, like you said, by doing this you are becoming more familiar with the Divine Truth teachings.

Nice to meet you

Nicky

[Anita]

Thanks Nicky,
Nice to meet you too!

[Anita]

I had a re-read of my introductory post and found it a bit facadey.

Theresa, you mentioned about being ethical. I was ethical in some ways at work. But in others no! I had kind of an apprentice practice, and the shop owner did not have to pay my salary. It was instead paid by the dole. Hope that makes sense. I did not work as many hours as I should but still claimed the full hours.
I got unemployed a year ago. And when I had all this time at my hands, instead of working on myself, I went into an addiction with this shop and the owner so that I could pretend that I had a job and get away from the depressing feelings of being unemployed. After six months I realized what I had been doing and the shop also closed down. So now I am unemployed again.

I have been insincere a lot in my life. I notice when I do job applications I am insincere because then it does not matter if I don't get the job. Which I'm sure that I would not get even if I was sincere. I'm in rebellion about having to work.

I registered to attend two of the upcoming Assistance Grp seminars. And then I realized that I can not go on being so insincere and expect to benefit from the seminars.

So I wanted to be more honest.
First I decided to confess about being dishonest with the job and claiming too much money. I had to tell both the job agency and the dole office. They were very nice to me and the woman at the job agency felt that she did not want to talk much about it and said that she would not put it in my records since I came and told her myself. I expect that I will have to pay the dole money back. I also had a minor fraud with an insurance company, I rang them and told them and the man said, 'ah well it is not that much money, does it feel better for you if I just say that we'll forget about it'.. He was very nice about it. Then I had to face up to keeping a loan document away from the attorneys at my fathers estate inventory at his death last year. 11.000USD, which is a huge sum for me. My mother was strongly against this, because she would rather see it as a gift from my father to me. When I informed the attorney she was very understanding about it.
This process brought up a lot of fear. But I'm still only scraping along on the surface of my fears.

I don't have such an amount of anger towards my soul mate as I stated earlier. But I do feel that I do not want a relationship again (ever). It would be nice though to know who he is and get to know him, just a little anyway.

Cheers
Anita