Hi Laura!
I am also glad that you asked your question, and gave me the possibility to reflect on all thoughts and experiences in the responses

Your sense of "
it will be okay" feels good - it gives me a feeling of hope and faith!
Yes it would be absolutely awesome to receive Gods Love and Truth about femininity and masculinity, and know from inside!
So here is Jesus mail to Hasse and me, (that I wrote about earlier in this thread). I believe it will bring a lot to reflect on, it certainly has done so to me - I am still reading and re-reading it
With love
Anna
Hi Guys
Jesus here.
I have had a look at the document that was sent, and the premise (suggestion) of almost every question is false.
Anna and Hasse; you see the soul as two halves. God does not. God sees the soul as a single soul, with masculine and feminine qualities and characteristics in various degrees individual to each complete soul. Every quality possessed by the soul is seeded from a pure desire within the soul and is transmitted through either a masculine or a feminine expression. In order for these qualities to be useful to the soul, the soul must allow the transmission of each emotion and feeling seeded to circulate through the soul (the one soul, not the two halves). This means the impulse energy (desire) must then be allowed to circulate by the other part of the soul in order for the soul to benefit from the flow of that energy. The parts of the soul that have masculine expressions must desire and allow feminine energy to flow through them, and desire to give masculine energy to the feminine parts, and the parts of the soul that have feminine expressions must desire and allow masculine energy to flow through them, and desire to give feminine energy to the masculine parts, if the soul is ever going to be conscious of its own true nature.
Blockages between the two 'halves' of the soul are self-caused, in that, each half of the soul can use it's 'will' to block the flow of energy (emotion) from the other half of the soul. This causes a separation between the two halves of the soul, and makes each half appear, to itself, and the other half, individual. But this is just the appearance of such. Each half is still connected, since this connection cannot be broken under any circumstances and has been created by God, but each half is now just now (not?, my remark) aware of its connection with the other 'half'.
The soul must 'split' at incarnation (this is a conceptual split rather than a physical split), into two 'halves' in order for each 'half' to fully experiment with and realise the development of the masculine and feminine traits, and to determine the use of its 'will', in order for the complete soul to see its own masculine and feminine nature. Even when on earth, the soul is not in two halves, but rather, is one completed soul, without a complete awareness of itself, or its two halves. Each 'half' must come to an awareness through a process of desiring and allowing emotion and feelings to flow from the other half of itself into itself and from itself into the other half. A completed awareness and flow of energy is prevented by the injuries that the soul sustained during the incarnation process in each half's awareness, the inability to allow the emotion and feelings of the other half to flow through itself, false beliefs within each half, a lack of learning of Divine Truth within each half, a use of the 'will' in opposition to love, and each halves resistance or allowance to God's Love.
When we incarnate, we absorb emotional injuries, which form false beliefs, inside the conceptions of each 'half' of the soul. This means that each 'half' of the soul is now damaged in it's own conception of itself, and its conception of the other 'half'. Because of this damage, it expects and demands unloving beliefs and behaviour from the other 'half' and from itself, thereby increasing the gap between its current conception of itself, and its awareness of the soul's true nature. This causes a separation from the other 'half'. Eventually it can become completely unaware of the other 'half' in that it does not allow any emotion or feeling to flow into itself, or out of itself into the other half. Usually in this place, it also acts out addictions, which are the unloving flow of emotion in and out of itself in order to suppress or control its own fears.
ALL of your questions are coming from your own emotional injuries and lack of awareness about how the soul is constructed, and from your own false beliefs about what it means to be masculine and feminine. Each of you have a desire to see yourself as two 'halves' but you are actually one soul that is currently in a place of attempted self-destruction by remaining aloof and separate from the other half. This is because the two halves are in competition with one another, each vying for ascendancy, for a feeling of 'being important'. When you become fully self-aware as a soul, this condition will not exist. You will not see yourself as masculine or feminine, you will only see yourself as having desires which pass through masculine or feminine traits and allowing the flow of such energy (emotion) through the entire soul.
All of your questions about God also demonstrate a lack of understanding about the same subject. Love is not masculine or feminine, nor is truth, will or any other quality. These qualities are gender neutral, in that they exist within the soul of God without a masculine or feminine attachment. Sometimes they are expressed in a feminine manner (i.e. when God conceived human souls, God made them in God's image, and this was a feminine process), and sometimes in a masculine manner (i.e. when God conceived the framework in which the souls would learn, or the Laws which govern the universe in which the conceived souls play, and this was a masculine process). No matter how they are expressed, the qualities exist without masculinity or femininity until such a time as the quality is expressed, at which time, they take on a feminine or/and masculine characteristic in their expression.
So Love exists as a gender neutral emotion within God's Soul. When God's Soul expresses Love, it becomes masculine or feminine in its expression when the way in which that Love is expressed is either accepting, allowing and welcoming (feminine), or projecting, giving and out from itself (masculine). Both forms of expression are equally valid, and in complete harmony with Love. Unfortunately, the women in the world often see projecting emotions as intrusive, and therefore injured, even though they do not understand they are attracted to such an expression when it is in harmony with Love. Unfortunately, the men in the world often see accepting emotions as weak, and therefore injured, even though they do not understand they are attracted to such an expression when it is in harmony with Love.
How emotions are expressed determine whether we could call them masculine or feminine. The energy of the emotion exists in a genderless state, and the expression (flow) of the emotion is what causes the emotion to take on its masculine or feminine quality. If it flows through the masculine parts of the soul, it will feel more forceful and giving, if it flows through the feminine parts of the soul it will be more allowing and accepting. You could liken this to water passing through a pipe which adds a colour to the water. It is still water, but, once the colour is added, the water has a different characteristic of colour added to it, and thus it becomes red, or purple, depending on the colour added.
Thus, a female person on earth, can add an accepting and allowing emotion to be added to the flow of her love. It is still love, but it has a feminine characteristic, in that it is allowing and accepting. A male person on earth, can add a projecting and giving emotion to be added to the flow of his love. It is still love, but now it has a force of projection or giving to it, it now has a more masculine nature. But the love is still love, and the desire to give or receive it is still a desire, and both the qualities of love and desire are gender neutral.
The nurturing emotion is gender neutral. When it passes through a feminine expression it becomes more allowing and accepting. When it passes through a masculine expression it becomes more forceful and giving. Thus each part of the soul can be nurturing, but how this nurturing emotion is expressed is transformed depending upon which part of the soul it passes through. Both forms of nurturing are in harmony with love.
All of the qualities that the soul possesses are possessed by the complete soul, not by its individual halves. It may seem like the quality is only available to one half when one half is blocked to the flow of that type of emotion, but this is not a pure state. Unfortunately most, including yourselves, judge the block as a masculine or feminine trait, but the blocks are just injuries to the half of the soul, and determine the resistance to the flow of the emotion. Since women are generally blocked by fear, this places a large limitation on the expression of their love. Fear is then assumed to be a feminine trait, but it is not. Women also generally allow the expression of grief more easily than men, but unfortunately the expression of grief is then associated with femininity, but it is not. God gave both the male body and the female body organs that express grief, and both 'halves' are equally capable of experiencing all emotion.
Interestingly, there are certain organs in the physical body that are different, and these organs help the half of the soul attracted to such a body to develop their dominantly masculine or feminine characteristics by using these organs in harmony with Love. Thus a dominantly feminine 'half' of the soul will be attracted to a female body, whose organs specific to such a body, the feminine reproductive organs, have been designed in such a way by God to allow the dominantly feminine half to express itself in the most complete manner. A dominantly masculine 'half' of the soul will be attracted to a male body, whose masculine reproductive organs have been designed in such a way that allows it to express its more masculine characteristics in the most complete manner.
Heterosexuality or homosexuality is only thought about on earth. A soul with dominant masculine traits in both halves of the soul will attract two male bodies at the time of incarnation, in order for each half of the soul to fully express itself and learn about itself and its nature while on earth. A soul with dominant feminine traits in both halves of the soul will attract two female bodies at the time of incarnation, in order for each half of the soul to fully express itself and learn about itself and its nature while on earth.
Anyway, as you can imagine, I could write a very large book on the subject. However, what needs to be presented in the soul mates interview with me, is the Truth about all of these matters. This will require you each to understand what kind of questions you actually need to ask. Many of the questions you have asked are either driven by not understanding how the soul operates or is constructed, or driven by your own emotional injuries.
My suggestion to you is that you modify the questions you have asked after reading (and re-reading) the basic information I have presented to you in this email, and then we shall be able to have a very complete and truthful discussion about the construction of the soul and the soulmate relationship.
Cheers for now
Jesus