Renewal
Sometimes, during the heat of the battle
Amongst all the inner fighting, anger and frustration
Take a pause and go back to the very beginning
And ask, “Why did I begin?”
Remembering the magic of hearing the Truth for the first time
The early experiences of my soul singing and soaring high
Naïve and unaware as to the battle to come
Yet having a childlike curiosity and inquisitiveness
Connecting with my maker
Experiencing a taste of Unconditional Love for the first time
Knowing it existed and how much I wanted everyone else to know it too.
Personal Truth then came and hit me like a truck
Fighting tooth and nail for my version of Love
The way I survived and got through life
Ever since, stuck in the trenches
Its been a dogfight
Tiring, exhausting, losing sight of everything that is good
Joy and enthusiasm for anything, gone
Love and God feeling further away than ever
Years rolling by like storm clouds over a lake
On a warm and humid Summer’s evening
I can’t speak as someone who is through the battle,
Yet I can speak from my experiences of the fight
Truly the hardest thing of all time
To give up my own Law
To not fight myself and my own feelings
To face the sadness and devastation
Feeling like a failure
Facing all the mistakes I have made
Nobody interested to know me
Feeling that nobody cares
That I am all alone
Not crying, not letting go
Not believing surrendering will work
And trusting God will be there to put me back together again.
Iridescent Eye – thanks to Stockcake for the free image
Linkin Park – Iridescent